An unsuspected arrow pierced my heart. I sat in a confused state feeling the pain from a misunderstanding with someone I care about deeply, wondering what had just happened and how I had gone wrong. Stuffing my pain seemed like my only option as I embarked on caring for my sweet grandchild who would arrive soon. In an attempt to keep her asleep, I went out to get her from her car seat, carefully carrying her to the nursery. As I started to carry her upstairs, her leg got caught in the baby gate at which she began to cry. I sat down and pulled her into my arms as close as possible, hoping to somehow take away the pain I had just caused. She is a two year old fireball, so hugging her this tight was a rare opportunity. As I held her, I felt her surrender in my arms. Looking at her sweet and beautiful face, my own tears began to flow freely from my eyes as I felt the recently stuffed pain of my own heart begin to seep out. It was then that I saw my Heavenly Father in my minds eye, as I felt His beautiful presence fall upon me. He was hugging me the exact way I was hugging my granddaughter. He gently whispered in my soul, “This is the way I love on you just like you are loving on her. Surrender your pain Linda. I will carry it, for you are my beloved.” As I put the now sleeping baby into her bed, the Father began to speak to me about His love for me, encouraging me to surrender my pain to Him. I sat down and wrote it out in my journal releasing all to HIm. I would like to share it with you.
I have known you since before you were born. You see beloved, you are mine. I created you. I gave you your beautiful eyes and when I look into them I see my glory. I gave you your personality and sweet one, I don’t make mistakes.
Before you were born, I deposited treasure in your heart straight from my heart. That treasure looks like a part of me and no other person has that same treasure. Beautiful one, I know the world tells you that you can lose your treasure through your own deeds or through the deeds of others against you, but that is a lie. The world also has told you that you must earn your treasure and your place in my heart, but that too is a lie.
Many of you are unaware of the exquisite beauty within you, but I can see it. I put it there. There is nothing that can steal your treasure, steal you beauty, or keep you from my great love. My love for you is so large that you could not receive it in its fullest measure–I desire for you to have it for it is when you know that I am good, my character is good, my intent and desire for your life is good. I desire that you know that my love for you is all consuming and in that love you will know who you are.
You are my beloved daughter. I always see you dressed in dazzling white silk and radiant with Holiness–that is the only way I can see you for that is who I am. My beloved son, Jesus’ blood, paid for all the sin in the world so we can be united as father and daughter. I long to walk with you in your everyday life and talk with you about what brings you joy. I desperately want you to have the desires of your heart. If I gave you everything you desire at once, it would be too weighty for you to carry, therefore waiting becomes part of the journey for us together.
I want you to bring your pain to me. Let me take it and I will show you who you are in my eyes. You are perfect. Let’s do this together. Take my hand, my child, and walk with me, dance with me, and laugh with me. I will turn your ashes into beauty and your pain into strength, courage, and authority. I know you feel like I have forgotten my promise to you. I know that your heart has been broken. If you can lay down these things beloved, I will turn it all into beauty. Your life will slowly begin to look like me. It is in your pain that I can be the daddy that you have longed for. Our relationship will grow so deep as you can share your pain and struggle with me.
You are enough beloved. I never see anything wrong with you–only things that are missing. I long to fill those places with depth, beauty, life, and love beyond your most vivid imagination or desire. Don’t be afraid, for it is where you are weak that I will shine in your life. I and I alone have everything you need for the journey I have set you on. Look to me. Call out to me. I am right here calling to you. Don’t worry about what others say or think about you. I am your beloved and it is I that gives you everything.
When I created this world, I gave you free will because perfect love must be a choice. I chose you dear one and there is nothing that will change that. There is more love, more provision, more restoration, and more holiness available just for you than you will ever need. Set your eyes on me and you will find it. There is always more of me to behold, to see, and to embrace. It is your choice.
Can you take a step into the river of my love and take my hand?
Can you trust me to lead you to the peace love and joy I desire for you?
I will be there as you let go of your pain. I will not let you go. Come beloved, and allow me to reveal myself to you and in turn you will be set free to be exactly who I created you to be. You will love the life I have planned for you, but you need to surrender to me now.
Come beautiful one. There is always more.
Love, Your Heavenly Father